Monday, June 1, 2009

Faith.

I wear a thin silver ring on my right hand that says "Faith."

A lot of people mistake this for meaning that I am overly religious.

I am not.

I bought the ring on a Saturday in June 2000. I had just graduated high school. The dog that I'd had since I was three years old had died that morning. But because my grandmother and cousin were visiting, we still went to Santa Barbara to be tourists. There was a little cart selling silver in an alley, and the ring just seemed to jump out at me. It cost me $6, and it's the one piece of jewelry I'd really be crushed to lose.

Faith.

Faith is a funny thing. I once heard that "faith is the highest form of love," and I believe that to be true... to an extent. But for me, faith also means something else.

Faith means trusting that things are going to work out the way they're supposed to. That things happen for a reason, even shitty things, and that we have to trust that they'll somehow end up right. That there is some entity out there, some greater good that's bigger than all of us, helping us through.

I can't even tell you how many times I've had to remind myself of this in my life, especially in the last few weeks. When I've been really down... sad, depressed, bummed out, questioning why things happen the way they do. And trust me when I say that there are still some things that haven't revealed themselves, some that may never will.

I feel like that simple word represents a huge part of who I am. My optimism. My drive. My huge appreciation of my life. My recognition that there are things much bigger than me out there.

I guess my point in getting all of this out there is this: I have an enormous amount of faith. It is not connected to any one religion, to an specific deity. It's not just a phrase or a word. And I don't go around telling people to "have faith," because it's something that needs to be found from within. It helps me be the best person I can be.

I guess a part of me knew all of that nine years ago when I stumbled upon that alley and that silver cart.

6 comments:

Lizette said...

this is a great post.

Jenn said...

I'll second Lizette and say this is a great post.

I love the Faith ring and what it represents. It makes me want to find something that calls out to me. It's nice to find comfort in these small things.

Abby said...

I second (and third?) the others who have said that this is a great post.

Katie said...

Sometimes all you have is Faith, and it has to be enough. The great thing about it is that Faith is a form of a best friend that you are able to control.

I usually place faith in my friends, but I've been left let down for I can't control them.

Faith is something internal that only YOU have control over.

Here's to having faith in Faith!

Charm City Kim said...

I agree with everyone. GREAT post. It's so funny how the word faith is so strongly tied to religion.

I agree with you on what faith means. Now I want a "faith" ring!

m. m. schnee said...

Your undoubtedly genuine appreciation for life is really the essence of Adriana. You are always unwrapping challenges and taking them on at the outset---and are refreshingly realistic about them---but then you swallow their reality and move onward. All the while, you seem to KNOW that good stuff that will undoubtedly offshoot amidst all this wordly doubt. And that has always been such an amazing influence on me. Your contextualizaion of faith is so true; glad I caught up on your blog today!

Also, sorry you have been down. Hope, aside from this blog, there have been some breakthroughs. xo